Tag Archives: drinking

Empty (Cease to Exist) by Jaz

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Empty (Cease to Exist) by Jaz

Scientists announced that they have located the gene for alcoholism. Scientists say they found it at a party, talking way too loudly.

CONAN O’BRIEN

Yesterday, while watching the movie “Helen” starring Ashley Judd I wrote the lyrics to a song. The movie deals with deep depression and suicide, not alcoholism,  but it helped me get my thoughts down on paper about how I have felt dealing with my alcoholism. I am sober now but I know that I will always be an alcoholic. It has been most difficult for me to express why I have drank in the past and to such great extents. This is my first true expression of the depths of my lost soul to alcohol.

Empty (Cease to Exist) by Jaz

I’m poison fruit

If  you only knew how far I’ve fallen

Maybe you’d understand

The depths of despair in my wall and

I feel so alone

Even in the most crowded of places

Storms in my heart

But I just can’t see all the faces

 

Between pain and nothing

There is only this

An empty space in my heart

And I cease to exist

 

Drinking all night

Trying to erase all the pieces

Drinking all day

Never want to remember who I was

Oh, I feel shattered

Scattered into a thousand raindrops

Falling so far

I always wonder will it ever stop

 

Wanting to fade

At the bottom of amber is this

All empty space in my mind

And I cease to exist