Monthly Archives: July 2013

A Little History……

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Ever since I can remember I had always wanted to be a vocalist. I started singing when I was 3 and playing violin in the 5th grade. At 16 I picked up the guitar. I never really focused on the guitar until the last year. I mainly used it solely as a writing tool. This last year, for me as a musician, have been my happiest and most productive. In my younger days, before I started performing pro at 19, I spent my time singing songs by groups such as The Eagles, Fleetwood Mac, Boston, and many more 60’s and 70’s groups. At about the age of 16 my taste switched and I was teaching myself to sing songs by Black Sabbath, Dokken, Queensryche and that heavy genre. From the age of 19-23 all I could think of was being a heavy metal performer. I went from Baltimore, MD to California as a heavy metal performer 

Things change. At 23 my husband at the time introduced me to the blues. I found it to be a real good fit for me as a vocalist because of my low alto voice. So, from 23-42 I was performing in blues based rock bands all over Idaho and Oregon. I loved the blues and it was a great fit for me. When I was younger my Grandmother talked a lot to me about our Welsh roots and always told me to have pride in our heritage. A little over a year ago I got involved with the Welsh Society here in Idaho. It was at this point that they asked me if I would perform at the Celtic Festival. I spent 3 months almost everyday teaching myself Welsh traditional and folk songs in preparation. The guitar work was the easiest part. The part that was most difficult was the language. Looking back now I find that the new Welsh songs I learn come easier and easier. 

Where I am at today. I love where I am at as a musician! I find performing acoustic and without a full 5 piece band to be so much more rewarding. I love performing songs that reflect me and my family’s heritage. Yes, the journey has been long and hard to get where I am. There have been many heart breaks, but, it’s been a fun journey and I can’t wait to see what the next 10 years hold for me as a musician. I am fortunate enough to be able to perform songs that are uniquely Welsh. It is also helping me to expand on my original music as well. The journey has been long, sometimes fraught with disaster and pain, but, I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world!

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Rehearsals….ARGGGGGHHHH My Fingers Hurt!!!!!

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OK folks, so I rehearsed for about 3 hours today and my callouses have callouses. LOL :). I am pleased with the way “Sosban Fach” is coming out, it’s a fun song, but man the chord changes are fast and it is quite the Welsh tongue twister to sing. I had taken “Llosgi Yn Flam” off the set list to make way for some new material, but it is back on for the Brewfest. I also added back in “Squeezebox” by The Who. I hope some of you will make it out to the Brewfest at Lakeview park this weekend!

idaho brewfest

How Do You Tell Someone that You Love…

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How do you tell someone that you love that they are destroying your life? I have tried and tried to tell my Mom that she is taking me down with her, maybe that’s what she wants. I don’t really understand why she would have some nepharious desire to destory me too. She’s done a fine job of ruining herself, why me too? I know you guys on the outside don’t really understand this but her church can barely understand or tolerate her. I don’t know what to do?????? I am in a quandry and in a labyrinth of confused feelings and emotions and the one that surfaces first is anger. HELP????

I Stay Away……….

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Maybe you don’t understand this unless u have been a caregiver

Yeah, hey, I want to travel south this year

I won’t, won’t prevent safe passage here

Why you act crazy?
Not an act maybe
So close a lady
Shifty eyes, shady

Yeah, hey Yeah, tears that soak a callous heart

Why you act frightened?
I am enlightened
Your weakness builds me, so someday you’ll see

I stay away

Why you act crazy?
Not an act maybe
So close a lady
Shifty eyes, shady

I stay away, I stay away, I stay away, I STAY A WAY

In All Honesty…..

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This has been the hardest 2 years of my life. In all reality I’m closer than I have ever been to where I want to be as a musician yet farther away from where I want to be as a participant in social life and as a musician. My mother has slowly but surely taken a turn down hill and she exhausts me, even now. She’s 10 miles away in a nursing home but I can already feel the pressure from her coming home, maybe next week. I tend to alienate ppl away from my life so they don’t have to see what I am going through. The last month, since my Mom has been away in a nursing home,  have been some of the most peaceful restful weeks , but that’s about to come to an end. The closer she gets to coming home the more frantic I get because she can be very manipulative and demanding.. 

I know this sounds cold but when you have no one else to help you her demands are exhausting. Unfortunately I have gotten worn out over the last two years and have taken it out on ppl around me. I don’t mean to. Seriously, but my energy is completely ripped out of me and when my Mom is around I just get pissed and spit stuff out of my mouth when ppl are around because no one really knows how I feel or what I am going through. I want her to come home but there is a huge part of me that wants her to stay away. She’s wearing me down, I do everything I can, but this is probably why my 7 step-dads never stayed. She wants entirely too much that I can’t give and I have absolutely no family support for the last 10 years except my husband and it’s wearing him down too. It’s any wonder why I am angry.

I am not trying to whine here. I am just telling you that I have said and done some things that are not normally in my nature, but when an animal gets cornered they will do whatever it takes to survive. I feel cornered and I have no one really to help me with this. I guess this is my form of an apology before the storm hits. The minute she comes home I’m afraid my peace and serenity are going to hell. This is pretty much how I feel…

A New Song….

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We have been very busy so far this summer already and are getting ready for the Brewfest. We are excited, this will be our first year performing at this festival and it is thanx to Jerry at Crescent Brewery that we are having this prestigious honor. The song I posted above is a new song we are working on, no it is not dirty. It means “My Little Saucepan”. get your mind out of the gutter LOL :). Since I spoke to everyone last we were adding in some new songs and have recently added in these two songs as well to our repertoire…. Hope some of you can make it out to The Brewfest August 3rd and 4th at Lakeview Park in Nampa!

For My WordPress Friends….

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Good afternoon everyone. For those that have been following me I wanted to fill you on on what’s been happening. First of all, if you didn’t notice, this page is evolving after 2 and 1/2 years of being My Buddha Blog. It is becoming the web page for my acoustic project, CYMRY.  We have had a very busy summer already and it is going to be getting even busier before it lets up. Second, my mother has been in a nursing home and had gotten quite bad about a month ago. She is recovering now and will be home very soon. I will be updating this page on a regular basis and keep you abreast of what’s happening. Have a peaceful day!